You were blind-sided, you had no clue, and you don’t understand how this could have happened to you. Your wife just told you she hasn’t loved you for years and she wants a divorce. She wanted counseling years ago, but you didn’t want some shrink telling you how to run your life. How could she? She knows you’re a good provider, working overtime to keep the bills paid, the house repaired, and hey, you even took the whole family to DisneyWorld last year. What’s not to love? You think some roses may change her mind, but she already moved out with the kids.

Maybe instead you are a devoted wife who noticed your husband’s cell phone bill had a repeated unfamiliar number, logged while he was working late. You swallow hard as you call the number, hoping you are overreacting. A woman’s voice answers. Your husband’s explanation confirms your worst fear: “She’s my high school sweetheart that I never stopped loving — she’s my true soul mate.” He found her on Facebook, or was it his Match.com profile? Your heart thuds, you go numb inside, unable to think straight for months.

While these stories are changed to protect the innocent (or the guilty) they reveal incidents that change our lives, and threaten our security and happiness. Your situation might involve less trauma because your children are grown and there is a mutual decision to separate. You may still be asking “Where do I go from here?” As a family law attorney in Santa Rosa for over 25 years, my goal is to help separating or divorcing couples navigate through painful situations such as the above. My goal is to make a positive difference for clients and their children who are surrounded by swirling emotional tides beneath their ocean of legal issues. The undertow of the breakup tries to snatch away their trust, and waves of doubt crash over their rock of security, so they need a safe harbor to repair their human vessel and make it seaworthy again.

If you are ready to start rowing your boat ashore toward a protected cove, I’m ready to grab an oar to help. Simply call to schedule an appointment and we will discuss how best to secure your future. I’ll also give you a copy of our newly released book, while supplies last! “Happy and Secure in Sonoma County”